Tim Apple Gaslit my Audiobook Library

So this morning, I decided to re-read one of my favourite books on philosophy. Ryan Holiday’s “The Obstacle is the Way”. Went to open Apple Books, brought up my library of “22” audiobooks. Count seemed a little light, but I didn’t put too much thought into it. T’was an early hour of the morning, and I definitely still had that fresh out of bed level of attention to look at it too closely.

Went to my library and I got hit with what I can only imagine is that PL-gun holding imaginary version of “Tim Apple” standing there gaslighting me via Apple Books, while simultaneously gluing Apple components so tight, the batteries and panels are designed to be 100-year fixtures, not wear & tear items, as he sits there laughing in “Lol, they still think ‘consumer rights’ should be taken seriously“

Yeah, no. The book simply wasn’t there, chief. 10 times carefully crawling through my library, sorting by artist, nope, still not there. This went on for long enough that I even wondered if I even bought it on Apple Books. Maybe it was another app? Another platform?

But I figured, hey, just to humour myself, let’s try some basic troubleshooting. Logged out, logged back in, Apple Books went “oh, my bad, chief, here’s your 25 audiobooks”. The database sync broke to the point of not listing a whole three audiobooks. I went from 22 to 25 audiobooks with one session renew.

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If you want to hear a bit more about the background behind the Tim Apple PL gun comment, here’s my full, no holds barred rant on the topic:

Tim Apple holding a PL gun originated from me repairing Apple devices, and watching newer models also get way more difficult to take apart, to the point where on some devices, I needed multiple suction cups and prytools. PL is used in new construction, which would be used to mount things like baseboards and other millwork, with the intention on that being a fixture of a home or building that’s built to last 100 years. But this level of prying in a phone on wear and tear components that need to be replaced to keep a device running? That’s just something I cannot get behind.

When I say consumer rights, I mean Apple does rake in billions off that buy-back and flip market, where they pay you $450 for your old phone, and resell it as “Apple Certified Refurbished” for $1,599, with a new battery. Usually traded in because a battery won’t last as long anymore and the Gaslight bar says “water indicator here says your phone once met humid conditions. We’re unauthorized to perform repairs on a phone that might have preexisting damage. But good news is we do have our financing and trade-in program so you can renew that lease” (yeah, no, actual conversation, paraphrased, of course, but similar to the original. I can’t even make this stuff up).

No, honestly, that was the story I got when I brought my trusty old iPhone 12 Pro Max in with 76% battery health. Swapped it myself for $35 and an hour of my time. Apple still updates it, and honestly, I’ve held it up against the latest models for years, and the differences have always been so minor over the generations, and iOS is always going to be iOS. It’s optimized for the hardware Apple supports, while it’s in the support cycle. This is why I switched to Apple to begin with. Phones just seem to get declared “obsolete” faster than you can pay off the last model, and they just turn it into a treadmill. But if you know how to keep your device running like new for years. Battery swaps when needed, keep it in a protective case, etc, you’ll get that fresh iPhone experience for years. Especially with the latest updates. Plus, hanging onto older models means when you’re using it in the rain, going to the beach, taking it on adventures with you, you don’t feel the same fear of that old device possibly breaking or getting sand in the speakers, or perhaps even accidentally scratching your screen, as you would with a device that you paid full MSRP for at launch, and have been cradling to make sure it doesn’t “lose its trade-in equity”.

That’s why their trade-in program works as well as it does for their business model. Honestly, even the newest iPhone 17 Pro Max has the cameras and specs that the Pixel 6 Pro has had for years. Apple does drip feed innovation over generations. But that’s why I like them enough to lean on their devices for my endpoints. Used or new-old stock, they’re solid devices. Buying one, the way I see it, would be like buying the tech equivalent of a Porsche, but with much harder depreciation, given that silicon doesn’t get any more expensive as it gets out-shown by a few margins on the new model. Maybe you finally got all three 48 MP lenses for a change in the new model. 4x zoom. Pixel has been rocking that for quite a few years now, with improvements on top of that camera configuration. Although I will say, that configuration is still one of my favourites in the mobile photography realm. Thankfully, used Pixels generally depreciate even faster than used iPhones. Just like with an old Porsche, the 12 Pro Max still purrs along, looks great, feels good, but it doesn’t have all the latest tech that perhaps the latest Cadillac may.

All in all, a little patience, persistence, and understanding of the system, digital or personal, goes a long way. Just like the lessons in “The Obstacle is the Way”. A little discipline and maintenance can make things go a long way. It’s a 2020 phone, 5 years old, but if I put it beside a 2025 17 Pro Max, I’d probably have a 50/50 chance of mixing them up at a glance. Plus, no phone lasts forever. Every new phone depreciates the second that seal gets cracked off the box. Every scratch, every accidental bump or drop. All phones get exposed to some of the most hostile conditions of any technological device when they serve so many purposes at the same time.

Plus, just like in Stoicism, by focusing on what you can control (changing your own battery, doing your own repairs), rather than factors you cannot control (Apple’s mishandling of old devices and their restrictive policies that usually result in refused service for any minor reason, then an offer to buy your phone at a fraction of what they’re going to resell it for). I mean, I didn’t even pay their refurbished price for mine. I got it used, for about a quarter of that, to use as a daily driver in the trenches of modern life, as a field endpoint that I don’t need to worry about. And honestly? Applecare is what? $20 a month? About $240 a year? When you can get the Pro Max experience on a device you don’t need to worry about, for not much more than the cost of a year or two insurance policy on a device in the thousands brand new, I think that’s a better insurance policy than hoping you don’t get smacked with a “we can’t cover it because…” clause straight off the Gaslight Bar.